Positive or Negative?

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Seeing the mud around a lotus is pessimism, seeing a lotus in the mud is optimism.

~ Amit Kalantri

For this blog, I chose a recent picture of Caylee the Zen Puppy while we wandered the neighborhood on a hot day. Do you see the muddy mess she is starting to become? Or do you see the absolute joy and fun she is having? Rather than scold and steer her away from the mud to avoid bath time, I let her investigate anything she wanted. She soon discovered how cool the mud can be without a care in the world. And then later, we shared a loving, bonding bath time!

I write a lot about perspective, as you know. So many things in our life can be seen in many different ways. And we always have a choice on how we will view them. Ask yourself if you are the glass-half-empty or full kind of person. And then ponder that for a bit. What is your first thought or response when a problematic challenge arises? Do you head straight towards the doomsday? The problem? The ugly, bad, and victimhood? Or do you take a calming breath and see the lotus (or the Zen Puppy) beautifully coming out of the mud?

If you find yourself more on the negative side by default, do you know why? Being negative might bring a strange sense of comfort because it has become so ingrained. Many of us grow up in a reality defined as negative, so we know no other way. We are constantly bombarded with negative news, gossiping, judgmental, and mean-spirited co-workers, family, and friends. The negativity becomes our routine, and we fail to consider the other side. We probably don’t even consider ourselves as negative – it’s just normal and what we are used to. So we slide right on in with the negative crowd.

When you start to notice this negativity from yourself and others, a lightbulb may begin to flicker. You might also notice that this negativity is keeping your happiness at bay. When everything around us is viewed through a negative lens, it’s pretty hard to be positive and happy. The more you pay attention, the easier it is to respond more optimistically.

I, for one, know this takes quite a bit of practice! When I take a moment to assess what is going on, I often realize that the irritant is not worth the effort and energy of concentrating on the negative side first. When I can flip the coin to a more positive side and see that this may not be as ‘bad’ as I initially thought, the negative aspect will lose its grip on me. So these days, I try to see the glass half full first.

Our lives are very crowded with unpleasantness. The list is long – news, traffic, weather, noisy neighbors, health issues, laundry stains, broken appliances, etc. Are they seriously worth the effort of adding more negative attention to them while depleting our positive energy and happiness? I think not. Negative thoughts, speech, and actions should not occupy much space in our world. We can always make more room for the good, loving, fulfilling, and positive blessings surrounding us. When we do, the negatives automatically diminish.

Notice also how you respond to others’ negativity. Do you jump on the bandwagon and take it up a notch? Or do you empathize and understand their pain and frustrations but realize you don’t need to live there with them? One of the hardest things to do is to avoid getting pulled into their negativity. As we work on our own positivity level, it becomes easy to start sharing it. Sometimes we can turn others' thoughts around and spread optimism. Other times though, they may not want to hear it. So it becomes a delicate dance that we will always have to navigate. And we need to realize it is ok to distance ourselves from negative people. We can always politely walk away to safeguard our own positive energy.

How do you view the mud?

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